X-Men: Apocalypse – Review

“Bununununuuuununuuuh, Bununununuuuununuuuh”

That may seem like gibberish but if you’ve spent the whole of the nineties enjoying the dramatic tunes of the X-Men cartoon series – aptly named X-Men – during the nineties that captured us all (well, some of us.) Exciting, the adaptation of the popular comic book series became our colourful, hyperactive series that we watched munching over our sugar addled cereal.

That eventually evolved into – well – X-Men: Evolution (my personal favourite) becoming more hype and exploring darker storylines.

And then, in the noughties, we had Bryan Singer’s first cinematic outing of X-Men which has since seen five sequels, two Wolverine spin-offs, and, of course, Deadpool.

Oh, and don’t forget about the initial comic book series.

So, it’s natural that we all feel all exhausted with the mutant movie musings and it’s only fair that this year, the excitement has ebbed to a quiet lull for the latest entry into X-Men fare…X-Men: Apocalypse: A film that is good but dotted with mindless and rubbish moments.

Spoiler Alert: James McAvoy isn’t one of them…

X-Men: Apocalypse is a middling film that relies on an uneven foundation to build up its premise and charm. After the events of Days of Future Past, there is something stirring within the mutant community. Worshipped as a god since his birth, Apocalypse hunts down powerful mutants to become immortal and invincible. Recruiting more mutants to his fold, including the heartbroken Magneto (after leaving Charles and walking this world alone,) the fate of the world is left in the hands of Raven, Professor X, and the young X-Men.

The action-packed slice of X-Men pie delves straight into the juicy helping with blood-splattering, bone-crunching mayhem that should have Fox whetting their R-Rated trousers as it’s clearly where the studio is heading. From the introduction of Apocalypse to the epic finale of the film, the sequences of hand gestures and CGI-ed powers are enthralling enough to keep our geek pants in a moistened excitable twist. The whole world is on the verge of complete annihilation and Singer fires up the fights to keep us all on the edge of our seats.

Simon Kinberg’s script is a lot less convoluted than Days of Future Past and actually impresses when it comes to the simple Mutant vs God narrative. There is a lot of humour and silliness too that marries charisma with characters, as well as keeping a gleeful cartoony element to the series that never faded since we first clapped eyes on Wolverine’s side-burns.

This being said, Kinberg and Singer have moments that drag down a possibly brilliant movie into an average and mindless affair. Cheesy stuffy dialogue shoved into the crevices of accomplished actors (certainly some of the best of our generation.) These awkward scenes really trembles the film’s triumphant storyline until it crumbles into a pile of average dust, making the overall feel anti-climactic.

Yet X-Men: Apocalypse isn’t terrible cinema and you can once again enjoy the scene stealing Quicksilver whose explosive re-entry into the X-Men lore has you wishing for a literally spin-off! James McAvoy masterfully transform into the wise and encompassing Professor who still has to battle with wits and telekinesis (telekinewits?) whilst Fassbender’s troubled bi-polar respect for the X-Men is underused. The big traumatic and larger than life villain, played well enough by Oscar Isaac, is too somewhat wasted – never aspiring beyond a simplistic human destroying bad guy and never embracing complexities that Brian Cox’s Stryker and Ian McKellen’s Magneto would do.

Apocalypse isn’t the best superhero flick off the year – that goes to foul-mouthed cousin Deadpool. It certainly isn’t the worst (*cough* Dawn of Justice *cough cough*.) And it definitely isn’t the best of its own series. A completely unnecessary film that has a surprising enjoyment to it or an actually alright action film with absolute tosh thrown in for no good reason – Apocalypse meagrely pleases.


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